A Mind for Grace

I was not just learning leadership.

I was learning grace.

And grace is a harder curriculum than strategy, planning, or excellence ever will be.

I did what any driven, type‑A person would do 

 I tried to build the most efficient team possible

Not out of pride, but out of responsibility

Out of that quiet voice that says, “God trusted you with this. Don’t fail Him.”

So I pushed.

 I planned. 

I strategized.

All as politely and encouraging as I could

 I carried the weight on my head like a crown and a burden at the same time

I wanted to give up

I wanted to keep going

I wanted to run away

I wanted stay and learn

And I told myself I was giving my best.

But somewhere along the way, 

God started whispering something uncomfortable, 

something I didn’t want to hear:

“You need a mind for grace.”

Truth is, I grew up under expectations. 

High ones

Expectations from people who were more intellectual, 

more experienced, more confident. 

Expectations that made me feel like I had to prove I was smart enough

capable enough, worthy enough.

And now… it’s my turn

Leadership has a way of exposing the parts of you that don’t look like Jesus yet.

I found myself swallowing words I wanted to say.

Holding back frustration that came too quickly.

And I realised something painful:

I was letting my expectations build rocks in my mind.

Rocks that blocked the vision for the future.

Rocks that made planning harder than it needed to be.

Rocks that distorted how I saw the individuals God placed under me.

Rocks that even distorted how I saw myself.

So I had to confront the truth:

People are different

They cannot think like me

no matter how hard I try,

and that does not make them any less

they just have different areas of expertise

they just have different levels of tolerance

they just have different capacities and planning methods

I can try to train them on other aspects

I can do my best to guide them and stretch them

but I cannot change the way God uniquely designed them

and I cannot force them to be just as passionate or engaged

and that has to be okay

Some things take time.

Some things take experience.

Some things take growth that cannot be rushed

and some people are designed to be the way they are for a reason

one that I might not comprehend 

but God does

And if I’m honest, time and patience for that growth to come

is something I often feel I don’t have
there are deadlines to meet
and expectations of senior leadership

So I tell myself, “I’ll just do it myself.”  

I take on the extra burdens.

I wait for the day I find people who 

think like me

work like me

and can lighten the weight

drivers

But even that is a lesson
Because this team is not mine
It never was.

It is God’s team.

God’s vision.

God’s unique collection of minds, personalities, strengths, and weaknesses.

Not with pressure
Not with perfection
But with grace.
And maybe that is the real assignment.

And if He trusted me to lead them,

then He is also teaching me how to love them.

Not with efficiency.

but with a mind for grace.

A heart for grace.

A leadership shaped by grace.

Because the same grace I was never given

God is now teaching me to give.

1 Peter 4:10 (NIV): "Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms".

Ephesians 4:32 (NIV): "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."